Saturday, July 18, 2009

While I was Out!

My red French Doors! LOVE THEM!

Part of the living room, before the wood floor was put in!


Hey everyone! I miss you all so very much! WE ARE OFICIALLY MOVED IN! I have some photos of right before we moved in! I am still unpacking, so more photos will be coming soon! I cant wait to get back to blogging!

My life has been such a roller coaster! My husband is currently in Battle Creek, Michigan doing an in patient treatment for PTSD! For those of you who dont know what that is...it is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder! He served in Iraq, and Afghanistan a few times...and he has never been 100% the same.

Our lives have just gotten so out of whack, I didn't really realize how this PTSD has affected us in our relationship. He has gotten mean and irritable. It is really bad, it is to the point that he had to do something about it or it was going to overtake our lives. I feel like I dont even know him anymore. That husband comes out every once in a while, but everyday PTSD is taking a part of my husband away. He needs help! And I need this break, I am emotionally exhausted! He is just not himself anymore, numb to emotion...I see a coldness in his eyes. I feel as if he wants nothing to do with me or our family anymore. I am scared. I would love some advice from anyone! I am scared my marraige is going to end if he does not get better! I just want my husband back! I know deep down he does too!

I love you all! Please keep my husband and his recovery in your prayers!


27 comments:

Julie Tucker-Wolek said...

Ohhhhhhhhhh sweetie I have missed U and I loveeeeeeeeee the photos....but I am sooooooooooooooo sad for U and hubby...I hope hope hope he gets better soon...I will pray for him and U! :):):):):):)

*Noelle* said...

I am so sorry for what you are going through! That is so scary and sad! I hope you are able to find the silver lining in the dark cloud that is looming over you both. Hugs!! I have MISSED ya girl!!

Taryn said...

I am so so sorry. So sorry. Please know that I am praying for you both. I am getting choked up writing this and thinking about what you are going through. I have absolutely no idea- but it must be horrible. I am so so sorry. You will have prayers in Colorado.

Tami (Pixeltrash) said...

Hi, Ashley! I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. It is so sad. I think you just have to remember that he's still the same guy and he needs you more than ever.

I wondered where you have been. Your red doors are adorable.

Frugal Jen said...

I will be praying for you and your husband. This treatment should help his disorder. Many soliders experience this (my uncle does research and treatment on PTSD).

Hang in there!

Mama King said...

I hope your husband makes great strides in his PTSD program. Stay strong!

iris7531 said...

Missed you. Sorry to hear about your hubby. Will keep you both in my prayers.

jenjen said...

Love the red doors. I am so sorry you are going through such a rough time! I will be keeping you in my prayers.

((hugs))
Jen

Walking on Sunshine... said...

I am so sorry for what you are going through!!! I pray that the Lord will touch your husband and YOU! Just be patient and know that your husband is there, just lost in the memories of he went through.

I love what you're doing with your house. Beautiful!

Leen said...

I will be thinking and praying for you and your hubby. Hang in there, God has a plan, even if we can't understand it, right now.

I love your red doors too. Congrats on the move and keep your chin up!

Adie said...

I am SO sorry to hear about this It made me tear up. I know adding a 3rd baby to our home has caused some stress between my husband and I that we have never experienced before. I know it is really not the same circumstances but our trip to Mexico was a GREAT way for us to reconnect. I hope you and your husband will be able to do the same after he has gone through his treatment. Have you talked to your pastor for some guidance? Best of luck to you and your husband.

Lisa T. Howard said...

Glad you have moved in to your new home, but I am so sad to hear about your hubby. I will most certainly be praying for you guys! {hugs}

Shaina said...

I am definitely thinking about what you and your husband are going through, and I hope that he is getting the treatment he needs to start feeling more like himself. This definitely hits home, as we just found out a few days ago that my husband is headed to Iraq in a few months - he has been recalled from IRR to active duty, definitely a surprise! Being a social worker, I'm so in tune to things like PTSD - definitely something I worry about regularly. Let me know if there is anything I can do to ever help!

Farmgirl Paints said...

So sorry that you are going through this. I have a friend whose husband suffered with the same thing. It is a real problem. My prayers are going out to you.

Lindsay With Lindsay said...

Hugs, sweetie! I'm so sorry you are both going through this. I don't have any advice to share, but I'm proud of you for helping him to get help. Hang in there, and I'll be thinking of you.

jacque4u2c said...

You are in my thoughts!!! Both of you hang in there! So glad you are moved in and love the photos!

Olive Rue said...

Hey Ashley. I totally understand what you are saying. I have my phases where I am tired of everything. In fact, I've been trying the last couple of days to get my myspace page deleted. But I have those moments too.

Glad you see you have been doing well. The house looks great. I've missed you too, sweets. Sending you a hug.

Julie Cornewell said...

Oh my goodness! I had no idea. Nobody ever calls me to tell me anything anymore. Call me if you need anything. Sending my love and prayers!

sony said...

Keeping you guys in my thoughts & prayers. God can make a way out of (seemingly) no way. You hang in there, & stay positive. Don't forget the "you" time.

The Geiger Family said...

Hi, I happened apon your blog and am currently going through some very similar things with my husband....I would love someone to talk about this with too...if you'd like to email me we could talk that way or exchange phone numbers....I know this is a hard time for you....I'm here to talk or listen...my prayers are with you.
Monique

lovinyahweh@yahoo.com

Twice Remembered said...

I saw the door photos and my hear skipped a beat - RED! I love red - nice!

But more importantly, I wanted to let you know that you are in my thoughts - I am so sorry to hear about your husband. I can only imagine what he and your family must be going through. I can't even comprehend the kinds of things those that serve in the war see and experience {I once saw a heart wrenching video on You-Tube - clips of the war and the innocent children - and it stayed with me for weeks} At one time, I had a really good series of articles in a Bible based publication about PSTD. It was printed right around the time of 9/11 - interestingly enough, just right before, I do believe. If you are interested, email me and I'll see if I still have some copies. I'd be happy to mail it to you. Hang in there! {{hugs}}

Walking on Sunshine... said...

Just checking in to see how things are going with you and your hubby! Hope all is well! Been thinking about you!

Chandra said...

I myself have PTSD, related to other issues, and its such a hard thing to deal with...

I am your newest follower and I love just wanted to say I love your blog! Come and visit me sometime...www.monkeyshinebusiness.blogspot.com

Queen B. said...

Oh honey.... I know how you feel.
My husband returned from a year deployment in Iraq, and it has taken us OVER A YEAR to cope with him being home.
email me anytime.

Art & Becky said...

My husband suffers from PTSD. I think he is doing the right thing by trying to get help. It might help for you to go to counciling to try to understand what he is going through. Your husband is still in there!!!! He needs help on how to deal with his emotions or lack of emotions. Be supportive, but also try to get some help for youself on how to deal.

Xazmin said...

I've missed you! How did I get out of the habit if visiting you!

I'm so sorry for what your family is going through. I have a brother in law suffering from PTSD...it has taken such a toll on his family.

You are all in my prayers. Please let me know if you need anything...even just someone to talk to!

I love the red doors too!

liz from new york said...

i hear ya screamin girl, we have the same problem here, only its ptsd from 9/11, hubby is F.D.N.Y. and was a first responder that day and for months on the pile scavenging for bodies. he is in treatment for the last two years, and s-l-o-w-l-y making progress. i just stumbled on your bolg, and i know this is an old post, but feel free to ask me anything, as we have quite a bit of experience w/ this stuff.. regards, liz